I love bargains. No doubt about it. If it's a bargain on something that will put a smile on the face of one of our daughters, so much the better. Unfortunately, such little victories don't always resonate with our girls.
Hence, I find myself where I was yesterday.
As a family, we go out for breakfast every Saturday morning. This weekend was no different. After a wonderful meal, we swung by Target to pick up some items for our Operation Christmas Child Shoebox gift at church. While on the way, I took note of a sign saying that a local high school was having a garage sale. Garage sales are the top spot for bargains in God's wonderful earth. Hence, after the original errand was run, I dropped the ladies off at home, gathered up some money, and headed to the garage sale.
I usually trust that God will gift us with SOMETHING at such sales. Sometimes He does. Sometimes He doesn't. This time, he did.
A little background. When we were in Lincoln in July, we were at my aunt's house for a family reunion. She took out a dollhouse for our girls (and some other girls) to play with. Esther sucked it up. She absolutely loved everything about that dollhouse and was a bit sad when we had to leave and she could no longer play with it. Since then, my mom (aka Grandma Davis) has been looking for a dollhouse for Esther for a Christmas gift. Jen has been, also. Jen found one at a local Weetail Consignment sale. However, it was a rather unaffordable $20 and came with nothing that you'd like a dollhouse to have (aka dolls and furniture). Therefore, the saga began.
Flash forward again to yesterday and there I was, entering a local high school, cash in hand, looking for a bargain. It took me about five minutes to locate two such bargains. The second I shall not mention here (as it is really not that important). However, for the first, I found a cute little dollhouse. Not only a dollhouse, but a dollhouse that had about five little figurines and a bevy of furniture. I looked at it, moved along, and a little girl started looking at it. Not willing to be a monster, I let her look. She asked her mom for it and her mom said NO. Hence, she moved along. At this time, I swooped in and picked it up. Oh, and did I mention that all of this was available for the low price of $5? That makes it a BARGAIN.
I took the dollhouse home and gave it to Jen, who gave it to Esther, who told me thank you. Cha-ching. I stick the dismount and am now father of the year, right? hahaha You don't know the half of it. But you will. Because I'm about to write more about it.
This dollhouse has particularly small pieces. Shall I direct you to the fact that I have a ten month old (two days shy of eleven months) who crawls around and puts everything in her mouth? Yeah. We took the dollhouse upstairs for Esther's use. And she started playing with it, immediately. Jen was upstairs with her and dared to touch a few of the dolls. Esther was a bit snippy about it. Jen thought little of this and came downstairs, leaving Esther upstairs with her new favoritist toy in the entire wooooooooorld.
I am still father of the year, with a head about the size of a medicine ball (not really, but I was very happy about her liking the toy).
Jen tells me, about an hour later, than Esther wanted help with something or other. I decide to see what she needs. I head upstairs......
Upon seeing me, whatever demon incubated in my lovely daughter at the time when she got the dollhouse decided to be unleashed. On me. Right there.
Esther started shaking and screaming NO NO NO NO NO!!! I don't think she wanted me up there. She cried, spoke in tongues, breathed fire, and basically was a very unpleasant child.
I can't say that instilled confidence in me that she was grateful for the gift.
I sent her to her room for a calming timeout. We give her these when she is being of a rather spicy mood that, if she remained out and about, she might actually hurt herself. They're done when she is calm. She calmed down. I let her out. She re-entered the library (where the dollhouse was) and said, 'okay, daddy you get out'.
This is not acceptable language, regardless of how calmly it is orated.
I sent her back to timeout. She went, screaming and crying.
Thirty seconds.
I allowed her out again. She came out and said, 'okay daddy you leave'.
Still not acceptable language. Back into timeout she went. The tears came back.
Thirty seconds.
She was released again. I told her to go downstairs. She did (surprisingly without any fit or fuss). Jen and I had a quick chat and agreed that she had lost dollhouse playing privileges for the rest of the day. Esther was a little sad about it but didn't protest (praise the Lord for that).
One thing about myself (and Jen, to be honest) is that when the girls 'lose it', I tend to be calm. The angrier Esther gets, the calmer I am. Escalating the situation will do nothing for either of us. However, just because I am calm doesn't mean that I am passive. A time out is a time out. And it is delivered to her in a calm but stern tone of voice. She knows that it must be served and that I won't hold it against her after it is done. If she chooses to ignore the time out, then we will spank. However, this is only after she defies our authority. That's an authority that was given to us by God. She usually doesn't defy after a swat on the bottom. And I never lose my temper, by God's power. To do so would be to lose control and that would do nothing to help her become a mature little girl.
The thing is, the dollhouse is a great gift that Esther loves. However, it is not the greatest gift that she received yesterday. You see, such bargains, while nice, are worth nothing if they have adverse effects on our parenting. Esther learned respect for her parents' authority (yet again). I am grateful that she decided to go downstairs when I told her. Doing so allowed it to still be there for her today. If she hadn't, I'm sure that I would have taken it for a longer amount of time. Leading all the way up to taking it away permanently, if need be. Praise God it didn't reach that point.
Because I love bargains. No matter how I might find them or what shapes they might take.
God bless.
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